Happy National Talk Like a Pirate Day!!!
Well, actually, it just ended... But September 19 is official National Talk Like a Pirate Day (Shiver me Timbers!)
To honor this important holiday, I offer a few cheeseball jokes:
What do pirates dump?
Where do pirates go on vacation?
Which member of the Beatles is a pirate's favorite?
What's the most common pirate disease?
What do pirates use as transportation???
Come on, you can figure it out! The answer to this one is at the end of the post.
I need a drink, desperately. Preferrably a Dirty Martini with 4 Olives. Or a scotch on the rocks. I love scotch. Scotchy scotch scotch...Here it goes down, down into my belly...
Why do I crave a drink, you ask? Well, because I need to unwind a little. Unwind, who am I kidding? I want to drink myself stupid, drown in my sorrows, and forget about life.
Kidding, kidding. I don't want AA coming for my ass.
Okay, back to why I need a drink: tomorrow is the last day of studying. The big exam is on Thursday.
Freaking out a little.
Just a little.
Yes, I studied my ass off. But you don't get it. Really, you don't. EVERYONE ELSE STUDIED THEIR ASSES OFF TOO. These kids, they're no joke. They're walking around assless all the time. And it's not just the master's students (population: 150) who are taking the exam. It's the medical school students (population: probably more than 100) too. These are some serious, die hard, super mega studiers. I'm new to this hardcore studying crap. I'm (as my little bro would put it) a n00b. A rookie. A study-like-crazy virgin.
Ok, ok, I'm exaggerating a little bit.
Just a little bit...
On a brighter note: immediately after the exam, there will be pizza and beer. Nothing better than getting trashed at 11:00 in the morning.
What's not so cool, is that before the pizza and beer I have to take a stupid exam. Did I mention the exam?
150 questions. ONE HUNDRED FIFTY EFFING QUESTIONS!
Ok that's enough.
Time to hit the hay.
Oh yeah, and a pirate's primary mode of transportation is: A ship. DUH!