Saturday, November 04, 2006


Gotta workout more. Side articles on websites are conveniently reminding me over and over again that the only way to burn fat is through cardiovascular exercise. But I hate cardio : (


On this fine evening, I watched yet another riveting, tasteless episode of Nip/Tuck. Watching it made me think of all the mean boys I know, and all the not so mean boys I know. This train of thought somehow led me to remember a theory that I've always believed is true:

It is often possible to anticipate how a guy/man will treat his girlfriend/wife based on how he treats his own mother.

This is pretty self explanatory. Now, this can backfire, as you wouldn't want to marry a guy who constantly compares your casserole to mom's, or the way you clean, etc.

BUT...there's a definite red flag that goes up when you see a guy who is harsh to his mommy, or even one who doesn't talk to her. Of course, there are boys with mommies who are crazy or unbearable but even then, you can tell a lot by how the guy deals with the psychobitch. It's oh so pleasant to see a boy who is thoughtful toward the maternal half of his parental unit: ie buying her gifts that she actually likes, taking the time to call her and talk to her, etc. I think boys who do this are more likely to have a nice *sigh* sensitive side, ya know? BUT OF one wants a momma's boy! It's nice to see a boy who is like that to a mom who didn't spoil him; a mom who raised him right and a boy who shows his appreciation of that, merely by giving her the time of day.

It kind of ties into the next theory, which is:

It is difficult to have a good relationship with someone who does not have good relationships with his/her family/friends.

Obvious. Of course, every family has its problems and its weird tendencies, but if you see that someone communicates with his/her parents and siblings, then chances are they'll be good at communicating in the romantic relationship setting.

Another one:

Boys who have sisters are more likely to be more respectful and kind, even sensitive *sigh.*

This needs some specifications. I run out of fingers counting the dudes I know who are mega dirtbags and are exceedingly overprotective of their sisters, even controlling. They act as though their sisters should never ever make any mistakes, never date any douchebags, without ever taking some introspective time to see that they are the douchebags who set the example for the douchebags that they're protecting their sisters from. Oh the hypocrisy.

No no, those aren't the guys I'm referring to. I mean the ones who talk to their sisters, who treat them like equals maybe? I don't know.

To make a more general point, boys who grow up around a lot of female influences who they respect and talk to will be great catches.

Speaking of siblings,

People who grew up as "the only child" or "the baby of the family" will generally have some annoying personality traits: greediness, whininess, and the inability to compromise, just to name a few.

Again, this is pure generalization. And I'm neither the first nor the only person to say it. Monica and I call this "only child syndrome" and have both experienced it first-hand.

Some other "diseases" plaguing many individuals around us:

Firefighter Syndrome and Short Complex. I'm still ironing out the symptoms and causes of Firefighter Syndrome,. Short Complex is a common one, also known as Napoleon Complex, I believe. Short Complex only afflicts males. 1 in every 3 height challenged males shows clinical symptoms of Short Complex. Despite the fact that there are tons of cute petite girls to go around, individuals suffering from Short Complex generally exhibit unbearable personality traits (insecurity, aggressiveness) and ridiculous compensation via material things. 1 in every 4 will drive an SUV/HUMMER in an effort to prove to the world that their height in no way represents the size of their member.

Time for bed. Join us next time when we discuss how you can tell a man's penis size (or penis-size insecurities) by observing his behavior.


ajbendaƱa said...

what brought this on marcy? lol very nice piece.

Marianita said...

thanks hunka hunka burnin love.

Maybe watching nip/tuck brought it on...

u r special.

Andre said...

Interesting piece Mari.

A lil bit too profound for Nip/Tuck though.

I'm sorry. But anytime Monique is added to the roster -- for ANY reason -- a show has lost its significance.

Interesting post. Not-so-interesting motivation for the post.

Marianita said...

oh my, do I sense some disdain for Nip/Tuck?

Who is Monique?

Nip/Tuck is trashy and twisted, yes. But I enjoy watching it oh so much. It's cause of the medical stuff, I swear.

ok ok, and the trashiness too.

Either way, the theories were not brought on by Nip/Tuck either way. I've had these ideas for a while. I think seeing the asshole men on Nip/Tuck reminded me of them.

Andre said...

Disdain for Nip/Tuck? Another understatement!

I'm so pissed off at Nip/Tuck, it's not even funny. I guess it's appropriate that the show is about surgeons, because Ryan Murphy has hacked this show to death. The first two seasons (and some of season 3) were pretty good. But since that Carver nonsense, I've been an opponent of the show.

MoNique, by the way, is the fat chick who played Mrs. Grubman's maid. She represents everything wrong with loud, sassy, black entertainers. Long story on that one...

Marianita said...

I just started watching it this season, so I guess I missed the good stuff, huh?

Regardless, this post was not about Nip/Tuck at all... I can see that show really pisses you off!!!